Dear Google,
I think Droid’s marketing campaign is weak at best.
I know the marketing team meant it as a statement of strength, like (read this next bit in a superhero voice) What can droid do? It can do anything! It can even do apps. (stop reading in your superhero voice) *BUZZER SOUND* Wrong answer.
Here’s the problem(s):
1) When someone says that a particular piece of technology “does” something it sounds like they don’t know what they’re talking about. Droid ‘does’ the facebook! It ‘does’ the email! It ‘does’ the touchscreen! It ‘does’ that crazy schmoyle thingamajig! Droid ‘does’ the STUPID. Stop with the ‘does this’, ‘does that’ business.
suggestion 1) Instead of saying it ‘does’ anything, be specific. If apps are its strongest point, say “Droid has an awesome app market where everything you could imagine is at your fingertips, and literally anyone with an idea can make an app for that.” or something along those lines. Also, are apps really your strongest feature? What about a specific app in action? That is much more interesting and then people want it for specifically that, which is good! It’s a story that goes like this:
“Lalalala, I’m just walking down the street. Uh oh, I just spilled grape juice down my blouse. oh great. oh great. oh great. Now I have to get it dry cleaned! Also, I’m about to get mugged! BZZZZOOWW!! Droid to the rescue! Now with our brand new grape stain remover app, you can now be sure that your blouses have nothing to fear when you go out on the town armed with a grape soda, high heels and a poor sense of balance! Also, need to get rid of that pesky mugger?! BLUDGEON THAT BASTARD TO DEATH with your HUGE DROID PHONE! Droid will literally save your life. *Ding!*” …and scene. See the difference? Much more effective, and the people that you want to buy your phones will be able to relate.
2) The whole phrase, “Droid does apps.” seems a bit whiny if you think of it with a ‘yeah but,’ in front of it. It sounds like they’re saying, well, iPhone does apps, but droid does apps too! Wahhhhhh! Also, there’s poop in my diapers. Good thing my diaper does poop! yaaaaaaay
suggestion 2) Don’t try and respond to how awe-inspiring the iPhone is. Innovate on your own (you are good at it). I know it’s hard when your whole product is a reaction to Apple’s game changer that has transformed the way people think about phones and what they are capable of, but you can do much better. Push the fact that it’s open to everyone. Push the fact that you will beat people up if they don’t buy your phone. Push the fact that you’re freaking google, and you made a freaking phone.
I mean c’mon. YOU”RE GOOGLE. Push people around! Or maybe just don’t tell me that your stuff does stuff.
Sincerely,
Dann Stockton